Weewit

As of yesterday, Suffian Hakim bin Supoano officially does not qualify to write for this blog. Hence, he will be kicked out indefinitely until future unfortunate events take place or somebody leaves him a token.

But since kita semua members, I would like to wish him happiness and for more X games medals to come in whatever he is in right now. Oh ya, it is called a relationship. Something my many other loser friends and I may not experience ever again. Sial betul.

So technically, it seems that it will take an average of 94 posts for one of us to bail out of this blog. So keep on writing guys, you may be next.

Aloha!

On Sunday, I attended the birthday celebration cum chalet cum sleepover cum BBQ at Aloha Loyang. It was held specially for my one year old cousin, Elham Hady. I say cousin to simplify my relationship to him. Technically, he is my first cousin once removed. My future children would then be second cousins to him. So kesian Hady, no second cousins to play with.

The chalet itself was spacious to say the least. It was double storeyed and had 4 air conditioned rooms coupled with a kitchen and a living room. Not forgetting a BBQ pit facing a swimming pool on the outside. Somehow or rather, Didil and I were behind the pits all night adding charcoal, starting a fire, flipping otak-otaks, grilling chickens and cooking SATAYS. And when I realized that was the closest I will ever come to one, I embraced the moment and refused to budge. But in the end, people still took my satays away. Standard ah.

The rest of the night was spent talking to my cousins. It’s always nice to talk to them la since they are all grown up. And Nas will wish that he was there too, kan kan.

He just started walking. Damn cute.

My first cousin once removed looking good in the suit.

We totally owned that space la.

Amacam. Spot your TLFC players.

But seriously la, we should have our own chalet soon. Or at least a barbeque together. I will volunteer my services.

Sebilah pantun

If you ever wondered what actually happened when Suff and I were classmates, then here’s a little taste of it.

Though it did not turn out to be the wisest academic choices for both of us ,it was certainly the most fun. For a start, we influenced 4 of our other male classmates to act like us, speak like us and think like us. That itself is a scary thought and I pitied those fellas. Before you knew it, they were spouting alien words such as satay, sambal, intip and basmi at a daily basis. Malay words that were inappropriately used by the Malay students themselves. More often than not, we were passing a piece of paper around writing nonsense and trying to make it rhyme. 90 percent of the time happened during Chemistry lecture. No wonder la I got a distinction in Chem S Paper. But at the end of the 2 years, we finally managed to put our brains into good use and came out with a farewell poems for all of our 4 teachers.

This is the one we wrote for our Maths and form teacher :

Form tutor, friend and mentor
Two plus eight equals to four
Thanks to you we learn how to count
You cheer us up when we are feeling down

Being our form teacher is definitely tough
Heaving complaints, collecting forms and stuff
We try to make you happy but most of the times we can’t
Hopefully the probability of you liking this is one

Thanks for the love, concern and care
A teacher like you is very rare
For guiding us through our life in JC
Love always from Suff, Aizat, Raph, Ronald, Caleb and Jamie

We actually bought special papers and wrote this with nicely colored inks. I remembered her saying that it was one of the sweetest things her students has ever done for her. It is damn nostalgic la thinking about it.

We wrote a lot of other stuffs also and if only Suff can find it, then it would be nice to be able to read it 4 years on. But knowing him, Nas would have a satay first before that happens. But then again, maybe not. Suff, kau ada chance. Keep searching.

Yes la

This is how the past few days has been for me.

Wednesday - Stayed up all night to catch Champions League Final. In the meantime, I did some work to prepare for my last paper. My mind was preoccupied with the tons of information that I had to know and hence, I wasn’t thinking much about the game. That was until the ball got rolling. The game was such an emotional rollercoaster. I was tearing my hair out during the penalty shootout and was resigned to the fact that Chelsea was going to win it. Terry’s miss was unbelievable and I was more relieved than anything else after the game. I watched on to see Man U lift the cup and bask themselves in glory. At this point, I thought nothing about the paper.

Thursday - Dalam sekelip mata, I woke up and it was already 1pm. I still had a bit to cover for next day’s paper but absorbing new information was hard because of the fatigue from last night’s game. Yes it was emotionally draining for the fans. To further add to the joy, David Cook won American Idol. Thank God he did because I think that Archuleta has the charisma of a chair and he is too much of a goody two shoes.

Today - I left the exam hall with one hour to go. Not that I was supremely confident but because I could not have changed my answers any better. I was walking towards the MRT station when I saw the Adidas sale that was on. In an instant, my shopping craves were back and I bought a bag, a tennis shirt and this damn cute palm size Adidas Originals shoes for my 1 year old cousin. The stuff there are really very berpatutan secara harga.

So now that everything’s done and dusted, I am finally back at the helm. Helmssss. Macam korang kisah. More importantly , I now have time for my weekly clubbing nights and with my satay. Standard la.

Glory Glory Man United!

This entry has nothing to do with Man U winning the league but I just wanted to have it there. Baik man u!

Hey guys. it is here. The event everyone has been waiting for. The Great Singapore Sale! Isap la ok.

Nas and I plan to catch Indiana Jones 4 tomorrow and if I am not mistaken, some of you guys want to go Expo for the Adidas sale. So in order not to end up in town at 7pm frantically trying to find a cinema which still has Indiana Jones tickets, Nas and I are going to town tomorrow at around 1 to get the tickets first.

So we need to confirm the attendance for tomorrow. So far we have:

1) Nobody
2) Nobody
17) Nazir
17) Nas

So please leave a tag or message me if you plan to pay $10 to watch a 65 year old man with a Fedora trying to act cool.

AFL?

Guys, I just had ermengency meeting with the TLFC board of directors. During the meeting, we were informed by Suriyat Lee that our resources were running low. Actually, we have no resources to start with.

Ok ok, to put it simply, Nas and I are of the opinion that we should not continue with AFL for this season. I don't want to go into details as to why we hold that view. I'm sure most of you should know why.

Anyway, if you guys are totally against this and want to vehemently argue for us staying in the league, please inform me as soon as possible. If not, I'll inform John Tay that we are pulling out of the league.

Regards
Nazir 17

He's only 18

Many of you all may have not known this but I love Paul Scholes. I truly feel that he’s beyond GODLIKE. Maybe not a NASRUDDINNNN yet, but he comes close.

Sure, I may have admired Beckham greatly for his dead ball striking abilities and who doesn’t right but as I grew up, I have acquired a taste for footballers that play the game simply but beautifully. Off the top of my head right now, I can think of so many central midfielders that fit that category. Fabregas, Xavi, Iniesta, Pirlo, and of course Goh Tat Chuan. They are all great passers of the ball who possess that extra bit of craft and vision. But hands down, a certain number 18 still tops the list.

Obviously, Scholes is now into his twilight years but that does not change his game one bit. He has never relied on exceptional speed to beat the players but so often, he makes do with his speed of thought. He is probably one of the most underrated great players of all time .He rarely seeks publicity and you will find very few hullabaloos written about him. However, the best testament to his abilities comes from his fellow professionals that play the game. When Zidane cites you as one of the best players you’ve ever played against, you know you are not that bad.

And I got this information from the Newpaper a few days back. It’s an article called EPL in numbers. Cesc Fabregas may have made the most number of passes with 2318 but Paul Scholes has the highest passing completion rate in the EPL with 89.7% out of 1592 passes. That’s a staggering kisurat statistic. To put it in perspective, out of 10 passes attempted, 9 of them will find his teammate. That’s truly amazing because the game is so fast and furious and packed with constant pressing and yet he always always manages to keep calm. If you watch Man U play the next time, try to observe Scholes’s movements. It’s unfathomable how he perpetually manages to find or create space for himself amidst all that is going on.

So can I play like you pretty please?

The Failure Of Friendships, In A Positive Spin

Guys I'm gonna talk about a girl in this entry. Being single for so long, you guys might not know what I'm talking about but just try to catch up okay? Especially you, Zat.

You know how when you meet a girl you cannot be friends with her? It happens a lot, and it happens because of one, or a combination, of several reasons.

Firstly, she might be tello. Yes we're superficial, but come on, who wants to make friends with somebody who looks like something I could conjure up in the toilet?

Secondly, she might be boring. She can be...talk..ing...to....you...and...zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz.

Thirdly, you're too arrogant fuck. Yes, Nazir, this is especially for you. You never know how much a person can benefit your life until you open up to them.

And lastly, she could be the helloest thing in the world to you. And you share something really special with her. I mean, friendships are beautiful but sometimes they just don't do justice to what you share with the girl. Sometimes friendships just cannot contain the dearth of emotions, fondness and chemistry that a guy and a girl can share.

And that's what I have with Rachael.

So in tribute to that, pictures, sial.

AWOL

Recently, I have been receiving a lot of letters and emails from readers of TOWNS regarding my prolong absence at the blog. Apparently, we have a very wide fan base. But apparently not, because I’m just making this up as I write.

So for those who actually bothered about my existence, here’s a letter of explanation of some sorts. The short answer would be the Exams of course but I’m afraid that Exams are just part reason and part excuse. Because there’s surely nothing wrong in logging on to the Net to rid of your exam stress once In a while. However, you must understand that the Internet is very distracting and you need to have discipline to balance between this leisure time of surfing the Net and then back to work. Unfortunately for me, I have discipline in minuscule amounts. So as not to be tempted by this distraction, I simply stop turning on the laptop altogether. Problem solved. So does this mean I am burying myself in my books and notes? NO. It just means I have one less distraction because after all, you still have the television and it is a smaller guilty pleasure.

But fret not, because the people at TOWNS are constantly damn happenings and you can always look forward to their stories about clubbing nights and outings with satays. So one less blogger does not kill the blog. Chill ah.

But then again, lightningsssss speed eh korang tulis.

Satay

Guys, as people seemingly doomed to being single all our lives, we have spent a lot of our time looking at hellos and doing nothing about them. Right, Nas?

As of tonight, I have spent a lot of time looking at a certain hello, getting to know her, talking to her and realising that there may be many fish in that metaphorical sea (which is stupid because I know of some girls who can't swim). Where was I. Yes there may be many fish in the sea, but not all of them are amazingly beautiful, smart, funny, incredible kissers, have very nice hair, click so well with you or has the same sense of fun as you? Not many I would say.

That is why I am so blessed to have met Rachael Nonis. And I think she's gonna be my satay.

Does that mean I get kicked out of this blog?

Here Is A Poem Entitled "Hisap"

Hisappp!!!! Hisappp!!
Hisap till the break of dawn!!!
Oh yeah won't you mow my lawn!!!










Yeahhhhh....

You just know it.

Guys, you all know right sometimes you can just tell if something is right or wrong. Like how 1+1=5 is right and 2x1=2 is wrong. Sometimes, there are signs.

You know that your group of friends is just hisap-ing when:

1) The most BORING person in the group is the one that has been keeping your blog alive for the last few weeks.

2) You visit the same/similar place twice in 3 days, and it’s not a pub or club, mind you.

3) You point out tellos instead of hellos. WTF.

4) The topic of conversation suddenly changes to something that sounds like, “The economy is !$@%!&+=R&#*?@#*&=?$^#&&.”

5) You go out more before the exams than you do after.

6) None of you has a satay, or so it seems.

7) Only one person has a potential satay to talk about, which I swear, will never happen.

8) One of you keep talking about hellos but do nothing about them.

9) One of you step about hellos but nvm, he’s right.

10) Start betting among yourselves about stupid stuff.

11) You realised that you weren’t there for points (2), (3), (4) and (10).

12) You're offended by the stuff written in this entry coz you dunno who the f*** wrote about this.

Wait For It...

Zal, I know Houllier is obviously merepek, but how bout Graeme Souness seh, hahaha. In all seriousness, Rafa should like wake up or smth ah.. his player selection nowadays is kisurat ah..

Guys, take a look at this trailer. Awesome movie coming soon. Nazir, pls don't simulate the title. I know, it's Will Smith, but chill ah.

Hail Rafa!

Firstly, I would like to congratulate Benitez for reaching another Champions League final, ooops sorry, that was last season. I have two words for you ah Benitez, thank you! For all you people who are thinking of becoming football managers, here are some tips you can pick up from Benitez.

1) Sticking with Crouch throughout the season, he's not performing but is still playing in 90% of the games, I mean, that's what a manager is all about, supporting the players. Seriously Benitez, why?? If Crouch is scoring goals like Kuyt then ok la, I understand, but he's not, why play him? Stupid fuck. Crouch played about 10 games max, but scored only 5 or 6, wtf. Kuyt played 30 games and scored 5 or 6! So just stick with the clinical finisher, Kuyt. I think the match analyst yesterday was crazy ah, he said during half-time something like, "I think Benitez will bring Crouch in. Crouch was a problem for Arsenal in the last stage." Wtf is the analyst talking about? Kuyt was the one who created all the problems, not Crouch. Kuyt is the main man in Liverpool now. Why'd you think Kuyt played the whole game last night? He had his name stamped on all of Liverpool's chances la last night.

2) When you wanna score, you play 1 striker. Coz 1 striker is enough when you have good wingers to attack the front. Good wingers like Benayoun and Kuyt. Benayoun kept drifting to the center, wasn't even seen out on the wing. That's the decoy winger, what a strategy Rafa, that's like WOW! Kuyt, Kuyt was blazing down the wing la last night. Don't you guys dare to compare Kuyt with Ronaldo or Messi, I'll smack your face. Kuyt is the most natural winger, he's at a totally different level.

3) When the score is 1-1 at 70+ mins, you play defensive coz nowadays the game ends at 80 mins, and after that it's penalty shootouts. So train your players in penalties, don't bother about their fitness. There's no more extra time or even injury time. They scraped it after people started scoring nice own goals during injury time.

4) When you're 3-1 down in extra time, you can do 2 things. First you complain coz there's not supposed to be extra time. I mean, you trained for penalties already, it's not fair. Or you can sub out your top striker to save him for the final. Oh, my mistake, he didn't sub out Kuyt. Sub out your 2nd top striker, someone like Torres.

5) Next season, concentrate on Champions League again. There's no more domestic league. If your team is good in Champions League, you can opt not to play in your domestic league. Anyway, you've already won 3 domestic leagues in the last 4 years, so it's ok to concentrate on Champions League now.